Its 28th May 2009.
Three months ago was my last update.
It's almost half year gone.
I'm at our new office. In Kelana Jaya. Alone. They have gone to Johor for our device testing. Tomorrow will be my turn. Going up north to Penang.
Have not been so happy lately, mostly self-inflicted. Have argued with him, several times now. Almost at least once, every week. Not liking it. Have cried more than once.
I shouldn't be posting that up.
Slowly, trying to attract good things. Great things. Like the fact that, he truly loves me. Like the fact that, he kisses me everytime he gets the chance to. Like the fact that, earlier this week he took me to the clinic, coz I've been having tummy aches and the doctor diagnosed it as a minor urine infection. Like the fact that, in an interview with a magazine, he was the only one in the band who admitted to having someone special, and plans to marry in four years. And, after the clinic visit, he sketched us, yet again, and he sketched OUR home for the first time.
Ramadhan's engaged. Last week. Getting married in October. Funny. I was itching to tell Illyaz the news.
Maybe these past few months that I haven't blogged, all emotions are clogged. Making me uneasy.
He calls me every night before I go to sleep, and (speak of the devil, he's calling now1!) I call hiim every morning to wake him up.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Of Letting Go
I finally tendered my resignation. On 3 Feb ago.
Was expecting a rush of relief but I didn't come. Apparently, The Director accepted it with open arms. He texted to the Admin manager, 'Ok, accepted'. Two words. I didn't know how I felt. But was unexpectedly quite saddened. Why? Strange. Thank God for my pillars of support - the two girls immediately congratulated me. It was something I had been wanting to do for a long time.
The past three weeks have been dramatical. Emails flying here and there, full with rhymes of sarcasm. Of course, these were sniggered by the Coup d'Etat Team. Haha. The past few days, I got a change of view. I'm probably gonna miss The Director. For his funny being. Like I shared with everyone - he's so entertaining!
Yesterday. Was what I would classify as a really special day.
1. We were all bombarded, rushing to complete software requirement list for David. Rushing to complete items for local authority company registration. It was a tight day for these three girls.
2. Southie came to visit me at the office. Came with two others. Took me out for lunch. Thanked and congratulated me for the tasks I was assigned to during the project. He's going away too. To Africa. Starting a port there. I so look up to him. It was typical of him to be nice. I'm not sure whether there was anything in between the lines. But he did ask whether I was leaving to tie the knot. Is that a hint? I added him on fb.
3. Sent my farewell email. After months of keeping a draft. Received so many (unexpectedly) good replies! Everyone is supportive and kind (again, unexpected). Even got a job offer from OUM!
4. Had dinner with Mi Amor in Rasa Sayang. Did I share that we have been snogging?? Cheeky.
5. Ramadhan came to the house. Finally - after 10 years - he has found someone!! I am SO happy, I was jumping up and down when I told Mama. And I hugged Aleef. And I texted Renny and Kak Pit and my Love of the news. He's so in love with her. Now this, was a total relief. He actually read out messages from his phone of the things they went through together, told me every single detail of his outings with her which took from 10pm - 12 mnite! He came to seek for advice, coz they're going through a patch now. I just couldn't believe that we actually had a decent conversation as friends, after such a long time. Alhamdulilah. I still feel that he hasn't changed much, I told my Sayang, that speaking to Ramadhan felt like speaking to a 17-year old. I feel so much older! Sayang, of course, backed him up, saying that's because he's in love - hence, he's acting like a teenager. Sayang is too nice. He makes me laugh. All the time. He makes me think. Makes me creative. Makes me wanna write music again. And work harder. And appreciate life better. He calls me Jiwa Raga. So Melayu. So sweet.
Oh, Ramadhan says, he's got an aunt with sixth sense? He goes to her for relationship advice. Okay. He said that she said - I (me) am a career woman. Wow. I was brimming like a clam! Maybe this setting up is right on track anyway!
I am at the office. Alone again. But loving it. I'm still replying emails from my liaisons who are shocked with news of departure. I feel like a fan club email post. Haha. Nazery Mima wants to take me out for lunch next Monday. So does KTB. I feel loved. I am smiling.
Have been telling everyone I'm leaving to pursue my studies. Let us surprise them again in the next few weeks :)
We are planning a getaway weekend next week. I pray for His blessings. I pray that He hears our prayers. To be with each other. For always. I'm getting goosebumps.
Was expecting a rush of relief but I didn't come. Apparently, The Director accepted it with open arms. He texted to the Admin manager, 'Ok, accepted'. Two words. I didn't know how I felt. But was unexpectedly quite saddened. Why? Strange. Thank God for my pillars of support - the two girls immediately congratulated me. It was something I had been wanting to do for a long time.
The past three weeks have been dramatical. Emails flying here and there, full with rhymes of sarcasm. Of course, these were sniggered by the Coup d'Etat Team. Haha. The past few days, I got a change of view. I'm probably gonna miss The Director. For his funny being. Like I shared with everyone - he's so entertaining!
Yesterday. Was what I would classify as a really special day.
1. We were all bombarded, rushing to complete software requirement list for David. Rushing to complete items for local authority company registration. It was a tight day for these three girls.
2. Southie came to visit me at the office. Came with two others. Took me out for lunch. Thanked and congratulated me for the tasks I was assigned to during the project. He's going away too. To Africa. Starting a port there. I so look up to him. It was typical of him to be nice. I'm not sure whether there was anything in between the lines. But he did ask whether I was leaving to tie the knot. Is that a hint? I added him on fb.
3. Sent my farewell email. After months of keeping a draft. Received so many (unexpectedly) good replies! Everyone is supportive and kind (again, unexpected). Even got a job offer from OUM!
4. Had dinner with Mi Amor in Rasa Sayang. Did I share that we have been snogging?? Cheeky.
5. Ramadhan came to the house. Finally - after 10 years - he has found someone!! I am SO happy, I was jumping up and down when I told Mama. And I hugged Aleef. And I texted Renny and Kak Pit and my Love of the news. He's so in love with her. Now this, was a total relief. He actually read out messages from his phone of the things they went through together, told me every single detail of his outings with her which took from 10pm - 12 mnite! He came to seek for advice, coz they're going through a patch now. I just couldn't believe that we actually had a decent conversation as friends, after such a long time. Alhamdulilah. I still feel that he hasn't changed much, I told my Sayang, that speaking to Ramadhan felt like speaking to a 17-year old. I feel so much older! Sayang, of course, backed him up, saying that's because he's in love - hence, he's acting like a teenager. Sayang is too nice. He makes me laugh. All the time. He makes me think. Makes me creative. Makes me wanna write music again. And work harder. And appreciate life better. He calls me Jiwa Raga. So Melayu. So sweet.
Oh, Ramadhan says, he's got an aunt with sixth sense? He goes to her for relationship advice. Okay. He said that she said - I (me) am a career woman. Wow. I was brimming like a clam! Maybe this setting up is right on track anyway!
I am at the office. Alone again. But loving it. I'm still replying emails from my liaisons who are shocked with news of departure. I feel like a fan club email post. Haha. Nazery Mima wants to take me out for lunch next Monday. So does KTB. I feel loved. I am smiling.
Have been telling everyone I'm leaving to pursue my studies. Let us surprise them again in the next few weeks :)
We are planning a getaway weekend next week. I pray for His blessings. I pray that He hears our prayers. To be with each other. For always. I'm getting goosebumps.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Of Changes
Typical. So many changes. Tradition of life? Greatness.
Mama is all excited with the wedding preparations. Apparently, she can't wait to get started on mine. I haven't told him yet. But he's met all my aunties last weekend. And last weekend too, we went of for a day to Melaka to go on EOM.
1. I am no longer single, ie: dating :)
2. My younger brother is getting married.
3. My best friend delivered a baby girl yesterday.
4. I am quitting my job and starting my own company.
It's CNY hols and the whole team is on leave. I'm all by myself here at this department.
Let pictures speak for themselves.
She's adorable. So like the mum!
Was scouting for lil brother's wedding invites and stumbled into some that I'd like for mine :)
Mama is all excited with the wedding preparations. Apparently, she can't wait to get started on mine. I haven't told him yet. But he's met all my aunties last weekend. And last weekend too, we went of for a day to Melaka to go on EOM. These few days have been a mix of feelings. I'm starting to get to the "unsure" stage. I have been praying lightly and been feeling a bit quesy. I need to jog. I need to run. Run.
I want him to want me but I don't. Confusing, kan?
Haven't been counting my blessings for a long time. But he's always on the list, anyway. And so is Mama.
I wrote two songs this past week. One for him and for Eem's wedding.
It will take me a long time before he gets to hear my song for him.
He's such a good singer. He already sang a song for me.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Of Newness
Today's Monday, 5th of January 2009.
I'm at home, on the dining table, attempting to complete several documentations for work.
I'm not at the office. Hehe. New year fell on a Thursday last week, so I took off on Friday and today. Have not touched the office grounds for 5 days. What a record.
Wow. Just thinking of what to write gets me overwhelmed.
Mir and Syikin were officially man and wife on the eve of 31 Dec. The very lovely garden wedding was on 3rd Jan where both Renny and I were the MC.
Yesterday, Eem called from London to tell that he'll be tying the knot before the month ends. We'll be welcoming Yazmin into the family soon.
1st Jan 2009
00:00 hrs - Renny and I driving home back from Syikin's on LDP, we encountered fireworks display from both The Curve and One Utama.
01:00 hrs - He came to the house to hang out.
10:30 hrs - He picked us up to for a very early karaoke session at The Curve. Had late lunch together at home. Sent Renny back to get her car. Had pizza for dinner. DVD session - The Duchess. He left around 2:00 am. Spent the whole day together. Sigh.
2nd Jan 2009
My spring cleaning day :)
Went to Ikea together with Renny and Amir.
That night through the phone, he said he wanted me to be his girl. And I said, okay. Haha. Very juvenile. But we like it.
3rd Jan 2009
Morning rehearsal for Mir's wedding in KGPA.
Night time wedding.
He came over and we escorted Renny back home. Then, we went for a drink in Aman Suria before heading home. This was already late night around 1 or 2 am. We were at home when he again asked me to be his girl - forever. And he said that he hoped that this will be his last relationship, that there was no other woman like me. And he asked to hold my hand. And he held it and kissed it. Then, he kissed my forehead. He was the sweetest being then. We went off to sleep at about 5:00 am after about another hour on the phone.
4th Jan 2009
10:30 hrs - We had breakfast. He pulled my chair closer to his. He held my hand all through our nasi lemak brekkie. He touched my hair and my head in the car. And he looked at my fingers, how it was alike with his. And asked how should he buy the ring for me.
20:30 hrs - He came to the house from his tv programme shoot. Went for dinner in Secret Recipe in Tropicana. Afterwards, it was Bedtime Stories in One Utama. The first time we hugged. It was all very dreamy. I was still thinking about it this morning. After he sent me home, and I called him on the phone, he asked to call my his sayang. And I said ok. I'm falling for this guy. And he's falling for me. OMG, when we had supper in Old Town in Aman Suria. Guess what song was playing? We Could Be In Love - but in Chinese. Haha. Coincidence?
This morning, he woke me up with this SMS:
Morning awak =). Syg awak. MY.
Ahh.. I've been thinking about him the whole day. It's crazy. Lovely crazy.
And I've been thinking about the excerpt from Dina Zaman, about keeping your inner most desires a secret. He was my secret for a long time. I won't tell him, not unless we really tied the knot. Whatever it is, now, I feel like I sayang him. Coz he sayang me. And we're both a bit giddy these few days. These lovely, lovely, lovely few days.
Will update more. Gotta get back attempting to do work.
xoxo
I'm at home, on the dining table, attempting to complete several documentations for work.
I'm not at the office. Hehe. New year fell on a Thursday last week, so I took off on Friday and today. Have not touched the office grounds for 5 days. What a record.
Wow. Just thinking of what to write gets me overwhelmed.
Mir and Syikin were officially man and wife on the eve of 31 Dec. The very lovely garden wedding was on 3rd Jan where both Renny and I were the MC.
Yesterday, Eem called from London to tell that he'll be tying the knot before the month ends. We'll be welcoming Yazmin into the family soon.
1st Jan 2009
00:00 hrs - Renny and I driving home back from Syikin's on LDP, we encountered fireworks display from both The Curve and One Utama.
01:00 hrs - He came to the house to hang out.
10:30 hrs - He picked us up to for a very early karaoke session at The Curve. Had late lunch together at home. Sent Renny back to get her car. Had pizza for dinner. DVD session - The Duchess. He left around 2:00 am. Spent the whole day together. Sigh.
2nd Jan 2009
My spring cleaning day :)
Went to Ikea together with Renny and Amir.
That night through the phone, he said he wanted me to be his girl. And I said, okay. Haha. Very juvenile. But we like it.
3rd Jan 2009
Morning rehearsal for Mir's wedding in KGPA.
Night time wedding.
He came over and we escorted Renny back home. Then, we went for a drink in Aman Suria before heading home. This was already late night around 1 or 2 am. We were at home when he again asked me to be his girl - forever. And he said that he hoped that this will be his last relationship, that there was no other woman like me. And he asked to hold my hand. And he held it and kissed it. Then, he kissed my forehead. He was the sweetest being then. We went off to sleep at about 5:00 am after about another hour on the phone.
4th Jan 2009
10:30 hrs - We had breakfast. He pulled my chair closer to his. He held my hand all through our nasi lemak brekkie. He touched my hair and my head in the car. And he looked at my fingers, how it was alike with his. And asked how should he buy the ring for me.
20:30 hrs - He came to the house from his tv programme shoot. Went for dinner in Secret Recipe in Tropicana. Afterwards, it was Bedtime Stories in One Utama. The first time we hugged. It was all very dreamy. I was still thinking about it this morning. After he sent me home, and I called him on the phone, he asked to call my his sayang. And I said ok. I'm falling for this guy. And he's falling for me. OMG, when we had supper in Old Town in Aman Suria. Guess what song was playing? We Could Be In Love - but in Chinese. Haha. Coincidence?
This morning, he woke me up with this SMS:
Morning awak =). Syg awak. MY.
Ahh.. I've been thinking about him the whole day. It's crazy. Lovely crazy.
And I've been thinking about the excerpt from Dina Zaman, about keeping your inner most desires a secret. He was my secret for a long time. I won't tell him, not unless we really tied the knot. Whatever it is, now, I feel like I sayang him. Coz he sayang me. And we're both a bit giddy these few days. These lovely, lovely, lovely few days.
Will update more. Gotta get back attempting to do work.
xoxo
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Of Recent Happenings
It's the end of the year. The weather has been lazy and rainy and grey and gloomy. Ironically, I don't feel so sad. Instead, this time around it has been invoking some sort of romancy aura, I feel like floating sometimes.
Just got back from Idan & June's wedding earlier. They were officially married four days ago and we went for their kenduris yesterday (June's) in PJ and today (Idan's) in Shah Alam. It still feels kinda surreal to see both of them up dolled up and sitting on the pelamin! I believe it but it still feels odd, but it's all good :)
Yesterday, we registered to run for a 12K next Sunday. We haven't been training much lately, due to our busy schedules, and I can't wait to see how we'd do next week! Both of us have been smoking too much and getting buncit by the day! Ha. We're much closer to each other these days, especially since the night he confessed in the car near, near my house, towards completing our whole day outing, that he's attracted to me (exact words). Oddly, he apologized to me cause he said he didn't mean to feel that way, and he was afraid that it'd make me mad at him for feeling such way. I surprised him by telling the exact opposite. He likes surprises :)
Oh, I've started another blog - counting my blessings at thinkmemorablenotmaterial.blogspot.com. Haven't blogged for quite some time.
Leaving jogging has taken its toll. Feeling a bit tired and dull the past week, and my tummy and back are starting to ache again. Was planning to jog this evening but couldn't find the motivation. How I wished he was here.
I don't want to update about work. It stretches me thin. Today's a Sunday, and I'm doing my best to make the best out of it. I'll have the whole week next week to deal with the headaches.
Need to revise on The Secret. My focus is a bit out these past weeks, and need to realign. I feel good but something else is holding me back - ME. Haha. Need to brush up on consistency.
I called Ms Oon earlier... Guess what? We're starting back piano first thing next year! Looking forward to that.
New favorite song - Agua de Beber, Astrud Gilberto
Your love is rain, my heart the flower,
I need your love or I will die
My very life is your power,
will I wither and fade or bloom to the sky
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
The rain can fall on distant deserts,
the rain can fall upon the sea
The rain can fall upon the flower, since the rain has to fall let it fall on me
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
The best thing, at this moment, in all this swirl of emotions? I shared it with Mama :)
Just got back from Idan & June's wedding earlier. They were officially married four days ago and we went for their kenduris yesterday (June's) in PJ and today (Idan's) in Shah Alam. It still feels kinda surreal to see both of them up dolled up and sitting on the pelamin! I believe it but it still feels odd, but it's all good :)
Yesterday, we registered to run for a 12K next Sunday. We haven't been training much lately, due to our busy schedules, and I can't wait to see how we'd do next week! Both of us have been smoking too much and getting buncit by the day! Ha. We're much closer to each other these days, especially since the night he confessed in the car near, near my house, towards completing our whole day outing, that he's attracted to me (exact words). Oddly, he apologized to me cause he said he didn't mean to feel that way, and he was afraid that it'd make me mad at him for feeling such way. I surprised him by telling the exact opposite. He likes surprises :)
Oh, I've started another blog - counting my blessings at thinkmemorablenotmaterial.blogspot.com. Haven't blogged for quite some time.
Leaving jogging has taken its toll. Feeling a bit tired and dull the past week, and my tummy and back are starting to ache again. Was planning to jog this evening but couldn't find the motivation. How I wished he was here.
I don't want to update about work. It stretches me thin. Today's a Sunday, and I'm doing my best to make the best out of it. I'll have the whole week next week to deal with the headaches.
Need to revise on The Secret. My focus is a bit out these past weeks, and need to realign. I feel good but something else is holding me back - ME. Haha. Need to brush up on consistency.
I called Ms Oon earlier... Guess what? We're starting back piano first thing next year! Looking forward to that.
New favorite song - Agua de Beber, Astrud Gilberto
Your love is rain, my heart the flower,
I need your love or I will die
My very life is your power,
will I wither and fade or bloom to the sky
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
The rain can fall on distant deserts,
the rain can fall upon the sea
The rain can fall upon the flower, since the rain has to fall let it fall on me
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
Aqua de Beber, Give the flower water to drink
The best thing, at this moment, in all this swirl of emotions? I shared it with Mama :)
Monday, November 3, 2008
Of (Confusing) Cycles
3 Nov 2008, 4:03 pm, HC Office
Now I better time stamp my blogs cause of the tendency to leave my updates halfway and continue it months after I start it.
Anyways, today has been a not-so-up-there day. I feel a bit bloated, although my menses are through. I feel a bit fatter, although everyone's been saying I've shrunken skinny. I feel a bit sad, although I'm over the moon with yes, the yet the unsaid name. I feel a bit disoriented, although I'm doing my bestest to emit focused energy. What am I doing un-right?
I've been smoking a lot, an average of 5 times a day at the office. Almost double up from my usual schedule. Feeling a bit out of breath and tired. Probably caused we've cut down jogging sessions to only once a week. I gotta jog tonight. I have to. Have to!
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things
Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things
Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things
When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sadI simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad.
I remember practising cursive handwriting in primary school with the lyrics above. And I've always wondered why we watched Sound of Music repeatedly instead of other movies. It was the VHS era, and there were loads of other movies we could have watched. Instead, it was Julie Andrews over and over, thanks to our beloved Mak :)
And this morning, I had in my head that Lea Salonga song with that Brad-something-fella..And yes, I was singing out loud in the car! Wait, let me google up the lyrics a while..
Haa.. Brad Kane.. It's called, 'We Could Be In Love'
(G. Burtnick/S. Peiken)
Lea:Be still my heart
Lately its mind is on it's own
It would go far and wide
Just to be near you
Brad:Even the stars
Shine a bit bright I've noticed
When you're close to me
Lea: Still it remains a mystery
Chorus (Both):Anyone who seen us
Knows what's going on between us
It doesn't take a genius
To read between the lines
Brad: ohhAnd it's not just wishful thinking
Or only me who's dreaming
I know what these are symptoms of
We could be in love
Lea:I ask myself why
I sleep like a baby through the night
Maybe it helps to know
you'll be there tomorrow
Brad: Lea:Don't open my eyes Ohhh
I'll wake from the spell I'm under
Makes me wonder how
Tell me how
I could live without you now
Both:And what about the laughter
The happy ever after
Like voices of sweet angels
Calling out our names
And it's not just wishful thinking
Or only me who's dreaming
I know what these are symptoms of
We could be in love
Brad:All my lifeI have dreamed of this
But I could not see your face
Lea:Don't ask why two such distant stars
Can fall right into place
(Repeat Chorus)
Both: Oh, it doesn't take a genius
To know what these are symptoms of
We could be
Lea: ohh
We could be, we could be in love
Brad:Could be in
Both:We could be in love
I like!
Crushy mushy so what. It doesn't happen so frequently and I've been single forever. Don't ask why, but I have. Did a little dating, with the most unusual characters, and left it all hanging in the middle. And this time around, it almost seems right. But the past few days, doubts have slowly wrapped itself around my thoughts. So typical of me. Still, it did not deter me from leading him on. Is this a symptom of me enjoying being unfaithful? I know I'm so damn loyal, well, I did the cheating shit earlier in life, and I've never done it anymore. Or do I really enjoy being unattached? Then, how come it makes me sick to know everyone else is attached? Void, won't you answer me once a while?
I've got a lot of work to catch up with, and I've got it all strategised and I just can't execute. And he's probably so deep into work that I almost envy it.
Yesterday we were on the phone almost an hour before I went to bed. Talking about nothing. Isn't that what these things are all about. Sharing something out of nothing. Wait a minute. Am I complaining about a blessing God has bestowed me? Have I left praying behind for much too long? What is the matter with me today??
Sometimes you're up, sometimes you're down. The cycle is vicious.
But the only way to go when you're down is UP. So be. UP. UP. UP.
And, love, love, love :)
What I don't like, I'm gonna be cruel but honest...
- not so good English
- height
- skin
- family background
- culinary preference
- music preference
- the ngada2 wannabe
- sometimes i feel he's trying too hard?
- his friends network
What I loike... :)
- his occupation(s)
- dedication to work
- ambition(s)
- movie preference
- funniness
- a look-alike
- he sed loike :)
- multi-talentedness
- imitation capability!
- he's already got me two gifts so far, haha!
- 10K and further distances in years to come, perhaps
- other hobbies - photography, ID, outdoor activities
Hmm.. so early and yet so much too say already? I wonder what he makes of me? But, would it be too much if I wanted to ask for THE Perfect Person to share the rest of my life with? A lot of people say, you CAN'T ask for perfect, you settle with your best bet. Nobody's perfect. Is this so true?? Is this so not?? Void, won't you answer me, please.
What if all my flaws were perfect for him? I know his flaws, and it seems that its not perfect for me. Will there be anyone's flaws that would be perfect? For me? And vice versa?
And the cycle is confusing.
And I spread love.
And I emit positive energy.
And I am (forced to) smiling.
And I am happy with all my blessings. I am happy. I am happy. I am happy. Ohhmmmmmm...
Now I better time stamp my blogs cause of the tendency to leave my updates halfway and continue it months after I start it.
Anyways, today has been a not-so-up-there day. I feel a bit bloated, although my menses are through. I feel a bit fatter, although everyone's been saying I've shrunken skinny. I feel a bit sad, although I'm over the moon with yes, the yet the unsaid name. I feel a bit disoriented, although I'm doing my bestest to emit focused energy. What am I doing un-right?
I've been smoking a lot, an average of 5 times a day at the office. Almost double up from my usual schedule. Feeling a bit out of breath and tired. Probably caused we've cut down jogging sessions to only once a week. I gotta jog tonight. I have to. Have to!
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things
Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things
Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things
When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sadI simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad.
I remember practising cursive handwriting in primary school with the lyrics above. And I've always wondered why we watched Sound of Music repeatedly instead of other movies. It was the VHS era, and there were loads of other movies we could have watched. Instead, it was Julie Andrews over and over, thanks to our beloved Mak :)
And this morning, I had in my head that Lea Salonga song with that Brad-something-fella..And yes, I was singing out loud in the car! Wait, let me google up the lyrics a while..
Haa.. Brad Kane.. It's called, 'We Could Be In Love'
(G. Burtnick/S. Peiken)
Lea:Be still my heart
Lately its mind is on it's own
It would go far and wide
Just to be near you
Brad:Even the stars
Shine a bit bright I've noticed
When you're close to me
Lea: Still it remains a mystery
Chorus (Both):Anyone who seen us
Knows what's going on between us
It doesn't take a genius
To read between the lines
Brad: ohhAnd it's not just wishful thinking
Or only me who's dreaming
I know what these are symptoms of
We could be in love
Lea:I ask myself why
I sleep like a baby through the night
Maybe it helps to know
you'll be there tomorrow
Brad: Lea:Don't open my eyes Ohhh
I'll wake from the spell I'm under
Makes me wonder how
Tell me how
I could live without you now
Both:And what about the laughter
The happy ever after
Like voices of sweet angels
Calling out our names
And it's not just wishful thinking
Or only me who's dreaming
I know what these are symptoms of
We could be in love
Brad:All my lifeI have dreamed of this
But I could not see your face
Lea:Don't ask why two such distant stars
Can fall right into place
(Repeat Chorus)
Both: Oh, it doesn't take a genius
To know what these are symptoms of
We could be
Lea: ohh
We could be, we could be in love
Brad:Could be in
Both:We could be in love
I like!
Crushy mushy so what. It doesn't happen so frequently and I've been single forever. Don't ask why, but I have. Did a little dating, with the most unusual characters, and left it all hanging in the middle. And this time around, it almost seems right. But the past few days, doubts have slowly wrapped itself around my thoughts. So typical of me. Still, it did not deter me from leading him on. Is this a symptom of me enjoying being unfaithful? I know I'm so damn loyal, well, I did the cheating shit earlier in life, and I've never done it anymore. Or do I really enjoy being unattached? Then, how come it makes me sick to know everyone else is attached? Void, won't you answer me once a while?
I've got a lot of work to catch up with, and I've got it all strategised and I just can't execute. And he's probably so deep into work that I almost envy it.
Yesterday we were on the phone almost an hour before I went to bed. Talking about nothing. Isn't that what these things are all about. Sharing something out of nothing. Wait a minute. Am I complaining about a blessing God has bestowed me? Have I left praying behind for much too long? What is the matter with me today??
Sometimes you're up, sometimes you're down. The cycle is vicious.
But the only way to go when you're down is UP. So be. UP. UP. UP.
And, love, love, love :)
What I don't like, I'm gonna be cruel but honest...
- not so good English
- height
- skin
- family background
- culinary preference
- music preference
- the ngada2 wannabe
- sometimes i feel he's trying too hard?
- his friends network
What I loike... :)
- his occupation(s)
- dedication to work
- ambition(s)
- movie preference
- funniness
- a look-alike
- he sed loike :)
- multi-talentedness
- imitation capability!
- he's already got me two gifts so far, haha!
- 10K and further distances in years to come, perhaps
- other hobbies - photography, ID, outdoor activities
Hmm.. so early and yet so much too say already? I wonder what he makes of me? But, would it be too much if I wanted to ask for THE Perfect Person to share the rest of my life with? A lot of people say, you CAN'T ask for perfect, you settle with your best bet. Nobody's perfect. Is this so true?? Is this so not?? Void, won't you answer me, please.
What if all my flaws were perfect for him? I know his flaws, and it seems that its not perfect for me. Will there be anyone's flaws that would be perfect? For me? And vice versa?
And the cycle is confusing.
And I spread love.
And I emit positive energy.
And I am (forced to) smiling.
And I am happy with all my blessings. I am happy. I am happy. I am happy. Ohhmmmmmm...
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
27th on 25th
It's two years past 25th on 25th. A special day regardless. It's a Thursday and I'm at the office with no one around - that's why I can blog! :)
Just a quick one, before I go on detailing later tonight...
Just a quick one, before I go on detailing later tonight...
20th October 2008, 1932 hrs, HC Office, Jln Yap Kwan Seng, pretty bad traffic out there.
Omigosh. I only managed to type two sentences above on my birthday? Must have been busy.
Busy? Understatement.
We've all got it all up to our noses these days.
But, its good... Its ALL good! Hehe..
Anyways, been meaning to update about my birthday - received quite a lot of gifts, this year (surprisingly, but its all nice and dandy ;)) Again, this year my birthday falls in the fasting month. So, had buka puasa with Mama and Uncle at Bubba Gump.
The night before, had buka puasa with Idan, Sarip and Kimin in Kelana Jaya. Near Idan's office, there's this quite nice steakhouse overlooking a lake. They surprised me with a birthday cake. Well, it was Idan's surprise. Kimin and Sarip were equally shocked when the cake came. So sweet of them.
On the B-day itself, I got a bouquet of stargazers sent at the office. With no name signed on it. With well wishes, and addressed to Faz Mohd. Was it a controversy? Probably. Cause everyone was suspecting both En Syed and En Arif hooked up and sent it to me. Then, they concluded, probably it was the florist himself. Haha. So sad, no one expected that I could actually have an admirer to send me flowers. Sigh. Haha.
The sender me a text though, I know who it was, and suspected him from the very start. Unfortunately, the text was to my personal phone, and I only managed to read it about 3 hours after it was sent. We had a laugh on it though, it's all good :)
Then, on Friday, day after my birthday, went for facial session at Derby Park. Ennie couldn't make it, so had it with Alia. Afterwards, we broke fast in Ampang Park. Ennie was supposed to join but she was stuck in the traffic. She only managed to arrive about 9. Pity her, pregnant and fasting and had to face the jam. Before that, both me and Alia bumped into Ali - who wanted to join us for our very late buka, but then re-decided and headed back home. Anyways, the point of this update is? I got a very special gift from Ennie - a Sony DVD player!! It's pink and white and she was in charge with the initial design and cost control. She says, "..sort of like my baby lah.." Very nice. It's all good.
Kak Pit gave me a basket of goodies - white spray paint, paintbrush, towel and KitKat for my DIY project! All came in a nice and classy basket arrangement, done in oh-so-Martha-Stewart-ish. I should post up some pics!
Mama, unneccessarily, gave me, a lot, a lot, of money. Sigh. She's so caring, wonder what I'd do without her. I love her to pieces.
Belated gifts? Teddy bear (not a big one) from Papa, and a set of perfume from Renny, and two bottles of perfume (also) from Kak Long. Gosh, I must have emitted bad BO to them, eh? Haha. It's all good :)
What else? What else?
Got crushy mushy nowadays. We actually spent about an hour last night on the phone. It's crazy. Is it? I'm not sure, but I don't want to be thinking so much about it anymore. My take on it is like jogging (ironically), take it in small paces. Be consistent. Just breath. Just take in the air and smile watching the sunrise among the clouds. The 10K is doable, in a blink, and so can this (not in a blink lah, of course). But its doable. I just need to enjoy it. I'm smiling as I'm typing now. I think I have always thought of him, in a certain way, but probably was too afraid to admit it. Or probably, I had really huge ego, and decided he was not good enough for me. Hell, I'm probably not good enough for him. But, that's not the way we should carry it. We're both good for each other. I know we are. Crushy mushy.
It's all still a crush.
I know he's got one too. Hah.
Okay, twenty minutes of updating. This could go on and on and on. I better make a move before it gets too tiring.
I'll let you know more about our Hari Raya adventures.
Oh, and I'll upload the headlines on 25 September ago!
Till then, spread love! :)
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